In so doing they have lost the deep, passionate, raw, carnal desire that draws them to one another and makes each feel deeply desirable. Real lust occurs when there is perfect polar alignment between masculine and feminine opposites. Sexual polarity had vanished and with it the feverish gravitation a man is supposed to have for his wife. Countless married women have told me they are not attracted to their husbands because of how poorly they are treated. We don't know how to sustain it so we disparage it.